The moments I will never forget

There is absolutely nothing like seeing your baby on an ultra sound for the first time.

The days, hours and seconds leading up to my appointment were some of the most overwhelming thus far in my life. The fear that I’d get the same news I received last time I was in that room was encompassing every aspect of my being. I slept maybe three hours the night before the appointment. I felt like I was going to puke sitting in that room waiting for the Doctor again. The *exact* same room where I heard I lost my last baby, it was hard to breathe.

When the doctor came in I made it very clear I felt like I was about to have a panic attack. She quickly checked my breathing and didn’t hesitate to start the ultrasound immediately.

Then I saw a miracle. She settled over a little human being growing inside of me and the first thing she said was look at that heart beating, this baby has a strong heart and she quickly turned on the sound so we could hear our babies heartbeat for the first time. It was beating at us loud, clear, strong, and fast as if this baby was saying MOM, DAD IM OKAY IN HERE!

The second she had settled on the baby the tears were flowing freely. I could breathe again. I could relax a little bit knowing that, for that moment at least, everything was going as it should.

We saw the baby wiggling around and then just relax and lay there using the placenta as a sort of bed to rest on.

I looked at my sweet husband who had been staying so strong and positive for me throughout the entire process and there he was looking at our child with the biggest smile on his face and tears in his eyes.

I will forever remember these moments and cherish them. Thanking God for even letting me see this baby one time and praying that I’ll get to watch this child grow up. I’m already so deeply in love.